Running from malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment my high functioning anxiety – tread lightly, retire early

There are days where it’s almost or completely non existent, but then there are other days where it threatens to malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment overwhelm and consume me. I share the writing below with my neighbor as I malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment was debating whether or not to publish it here, and she told me that until I’d started opening up to her about it in the malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment last few months, she didn’t realize I had any anxiety at all and that malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment I was just “totally put together” pretty much all of the time.

In some ways, I think my high functioning life comes from the same malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment place as that high functioning anxiety. When people ask me how I’m able to get so much done in my days, I tell them it’s because I don’t watch television and I don’t sit down much. While this is true, that drive to keep moving isn’t always one that comes from my want to do malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment more things, but instead it comes as a way to cope with malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment that background anxiety.

There are days I talk about wanting to slow down malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment and be less busy, but that feels in some way the luxury of someone malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment who doesn’t feel things so intensely, that can really relax and breathe and just let things malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment be. I feel hours and days of that, usually outdoors, either on a long run or disconnected on a long malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment weekend camping in the woods. But most days, that busyness comes as a way to fill the cracks malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment and keep the anxious thoughts at bay. And then I’m out the door and running down the trails again.

* running is a form of coping but not the only malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment one. Medication, as well as regular therapy, can be powerful, important parts of tackling anxiety, and while it’s not a road I’ve gone down as of yet, it’s one I expect to explore in the future. Mental health is a tricky thing, and something we all experience differently. And for me, now that I’ve gotten over the mental hurdle of accepting that medication malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment can be a very positive thing, I now have to get past the hurdle of finding malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment the time and effort – and courage – of dipping my toe into those waters.

Oh, angela. I am so proud of you for writing this. It is a difficult thing to be laid bare, to expose our vulnerabilities…and yet we all have them in one way or malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment another. It is truly a courageous gift you’ve given to others, for I believe it is in our authenticity that we malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment connect on the deepest level. I loved the book, “carry on warrior, the power of embracing your messy, beautiful life”. In it she talks about revealing her personals struggles to malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment a friend when she was going through her own struggles. She says: “there were so many layers of my armor and her malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment armor between us that we couldn’t touch each other. And even if we’d wanted to, we couldn’t have gotten close enough because we were shooting at malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment each other with stories of our “perfect lives”. Suddenly this all seemed completely ridiculous. Life without touching people is boring as hell. It hit me that maybe the battles of life are malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment best fought WITHOUT armor. That maybe life gets real, good, and interesting when we remove all the layers of protection malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment and walk into the battlefield of life naked.” I get that. One of my favorite quotes (although I can’t remember the source) is, “why are we here, if not to help one one another?” good for you for being real. I love you. Aunt M. ❤️

Wow, thank you for sharing, angela. Running and nature are a great way to manage anxiety malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment to a high degree and I’ve always relied on exercise to control those feelings. This is so timely as the past few months I’ve come to the realization that I spent all of malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment my life running from my anxiety by being an overly malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment productive person and also doing super hard core physical activities malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment in whatever down time I had – bikram yoga, half ironman distance tris, half marathons, full marathons, snowboarding 20 plus days a season. The movement and heavy physical workloads kept the anxiety in malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment check but not in the most healthy way. Having a work optional lifestyle has helped my anxiety though malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment I find that I get anxious about different things now. The interesting thing was that right as I stopped working, my desire to do hard core physical activities went almost malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment completely away. I found a new yoga studio which has hot yoga malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment but it’s more restorative and 8-10 degrees cooler than a bikram studio – it’s still hot but not headache inducing. And the yoga is still physically demanding but in a malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment different way and I feel like my body is responding malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment more positively. I haven’t felt the pull to sign up for any triathlons malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment or even a 5K and I do almost all my malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment cardio outside now, I think because I don’t have some sort of training agenda I’m following. I’ve even slowed down and don’t want to snowboard as often and when I do malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment go, I take more breaks. It’s almost like the lower anxiety levels produce less of malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment a compulsion to want to push myself to the breaking malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment point.

Regardless, thank you for sharing. I’m sad that you suffer from anxiety but you aren’t alone and I think the lifestyle you have created malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment is helping you manage your anxiety in a healthy. Having more space in my days and weeks has allowed malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment me to not feel that constant sense of time urgency. I have so much work to do exploring how I malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment can better manage it!

When I was a kid, another kid in my neighborhood who was my age had malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment crippling social anxiety to the point where he could only malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment play with us neighborhood kids in his home. He never went to school, but for a few years we could play with kids malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment from the area. Sadly, as we approached middle-school age, his symptoms got worse, and even hanging out with us became overwhelming for him. I never really understood it then, as I was too young, but I knew I liked him, and I knew he was a good guy, if a little odd. We were sad when he started saying no when we malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment tried to play with him.

I am a veteran, and am related to many. I have heard many stories from many tough men who malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment saw combat and faced life changing anxiety for decades to malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment come. My grandfather was in in france, and was severely wounded in the throat after a few malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment months of combat; his unit deployed to france 7 days after D day, and he was shot for third time in september of malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment that year. The first two were “scratches” as he called them. He didn’t leave the hospital from the last one until december malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment of 46. The loud revving of a motorcycle engine, or a sound like it, always made him jump and grab his throat. He only spoke of his experiences near the end of malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment his life, when I decided to follow him and my father into malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment the military. When my father volunteered, it was too soon for him. Not even my grandmother knew everything he said to me.

I use those experiences, people I know personally from different times, and vastly different situations to say this, I do not value one person’s struggle more than another. The only question is what help do they need, and can they get it. I am very happy you had the strength to post malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment this article. I am very glad that you clearly have the support malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment you do. I hope that you continue down the path you are malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment on, and I pray that others find the strength in reading malignant fibrous histiocytoma treatment this to get the help they need.

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