My ex is getting married – page 2 – loveshack histiocytoma dog removal cost.org community forums

I’m struggling a little bit tonight. It’s only two days, ffs. I don’t want to hear from him but I also do. I kinda wish he’d tried. Which just seems crazy. I know it’s best if I don’t but all I can think about is that he histiocytoma dog removal cost probably is having a lovely time with his new woman histiocytoma dog removal cost and not even thinking about me, at all, whereas literally all I can think about is what he’s up to right now. And how if I hadn’t left that note he and I would be catching histiocytoma dog removal cost up tonight. And it would probably be really fun, but then I would hear about what he’d been up to with her last night and then histiocytoma dog removal cost I would get sad. So I know it’s good from that perspective that I’m not currently (or in about one hour from now, tbh) crying my eyes out in front of him, but I am still really sad, I just don’t get the fun part beforehand. And the hug that he always gives me. OOh, there’s the tears.

I’ve been really feeling like I did the right thing histiocytoma dog removal cost all weekend, but I’m wavering now. I have saved the email he sent me a few histiocytoma dog removal cost weeks ago (actually the day after his first date with this new histiocytoma dog removal cost woman) saying I don’t want to be your boyfriend, I just want to be your friend. I’m not going to change my mind as the lock histiocytoma dog removal cost screen on my phone so I can be reminded all histiocytoma dog removal cost the time. But I don’t know if that’s wise either. Maybe I’ll just leave it for a day or two and histiocytoma dog removal cost then go back to something less heart destroying. I just need to remind myself that he doesn’t want me, and that pining after someone who has said they don’t want you is pathetic.

I went for a swim in the ocean tonight and histiocytoma dog removal cost spent a few minutes being thankful for the time that histiocytoma dog removal cost we shared each other’s lives and the joy that he brought to me histiocytoma dog removal cost for a year. I thought that might help. But I’m feeling surprisingly (given how I felt a bit empowered all weekend) low right now. I know i just have to let it pass. F*ck me, this is SO HARD though. Why on earth is this happening to me? All I want is to love him and be loved histiocytoma dog removal cost back. Why on earth is that too much? Fcking world.

I completely understand that feeling of wanting him to say histiocytoma dog removal cost something else. Why doesn’t he miss me? How can he just let me go? Don’t I mean anything to him? Keep in mind, he has not had to deal with your absence up histiocytoma dog removal cost to this point. At some point, maybe not right now, but after some time goes by, he will probably start missing things about you and your histiocytoma dog removal cost relationship too. Just because he is with someone new, he won’t forget you.

I’m a fan of doing whatever you need to do histiocytoma dog removal cost to stay NC in the first few weeks. For me, it was helpful to imagine that I wanted him to histiocytoma dog removal cost wonder why I wasn’t reaching out and what I could be doing. Every time I wanted to reach out to him, I would remind myself that he had made the choice histiocytoma dog removal cost to be with someone else and that I didn’t want to make it easy for him to know histiocytoma dog removal cost that I still loved him. Childish, perhaps, but it helped me. I was also pretty angry with him.

So I think if you need that email on your histiocytoma dog removal cost lock screen to slap reality into your face when you histiocytoma dog removal cost look at, I say so be it. You don’t have to wallow in it forever, but you do need to feel what you feel. People that try to glaze over their hurt tend to histiocytoma dog removal cost take longer to heal, in my estimation. Let yourself cry if you need to, that is totally fine. It’s been 5 months for me and I still cry histiocytoma dog removal cost sometimes. One day you will realize you don’t feel like crying all the time.

And, I TOTALLY understand about the other woman thing. I spent a few night not being able to sleep histiocytoma dog removal cost because I could not stop thinking about the two of histiocytoma dog removal cost them (my ex and his new girlfriend) and wondering what they were doing and how serious they histiocytoma dog removal cost are. It was a very uncomfortable feeling. I still go there sometimes. But not talking to him and avoiding her social media histiocytoma dog removal cost (and facebook in general, honestly) has helped me enormously. It’s kind of like he is an imaginary person to histiocytoma dog removal cost me now.

If you can get to the point when you’re ready for true NC, then believe FULL NC will get the distress to end histiocytoma dog removal cost the most rapidly. Once you’re at that point, suggest you don’t meet, look at pictures to reminisce, or check his social media as I believe it will histiocytoma dog removal cost keep it re-triggering. Really anything that strongly reminds you of this guy. Making a list of negatives to read and re-read may also help.

As pointed out in wiki, some, like myself, experience serial limerence and not to be negative, serial limerence which creates a tortured life. Interestingly, once a new soul-mate is found, the limerence for the previous immediately ceases, and the subject of the limerence is seen in the histiocytoma dog removal cost open light and you say to your self what did histiocytoma dog removal cost I ever see in that person? I am currently in contact with two on my past histiocytoma dog removal cost limerences with no problem. Another, while I was still in somewhat of a limerent state, I met is a bar and I was at first histiocytoma dog removal cost shaky. The two of use were chatting with this guy whom histiocytoma dog removal cost I clicked with. When my ex-BF asked me to go make to his place (can you imagine), I told him know because while you were in the histiocytoma dog removal cost restroom, I made plans (with the other guy) to go for coffee…

Alrighty. So I posted at the end of march about the histiocytoma dog removal cost fact that I was going to leave my ex a histiocytoma dog removal cost note telling him I couldn’t be his friend for a while, after I was struggling to cope with seeing him drained histiocytoma dog removal cost and tired after a wild night with his new gf. He (annoyingly) wrote me back, saying he understood but in time he would hunt me histiocytoma dog removal cost down and make me his friend, and that I would always have a place in his histiocytoma dog removal cost heart.

Turns out I massively regret doing that. I should have hung in there. I did message him a few weeks later saying I’d like to hang out again, but I was ignored. The following week I was at an event near his histiocytoma dog removal cost house, and ended up just going and knocking on the door. Long story short he agreed to call me after easter, so two weeks later. He did and we caught up for a drink. I thought it went well and I was pleased, and told him so. He had to leave because his new gf who was histiocytoma dog removal cost a bit unhappy about it was waiting at home for histiocytoma dog removal cost him, but we agreed that we would catch up again soon. I had a party to go back to.

I messaged him after a week (a facebook article related to what we’d been talking about), got a response saying I’ll be in contact in a couple of weeks, then I never heard from him. It actually drove me a bit crazy. I had been feeling ok but after 4 weeks of histiocytoma dog removal cost not hearing from him it was literally all I could histiocytoma dog removal cost think about. I was so angry and sad. I completely understand this is not rational. I just hated being ignored after what I thought had histiocytoma dog removal cost been a nice catch up and I didn’t want him to be rewarded for ignoring me by histiocytoma dog removal cost just going away. I missed him and I didn’t understand. Please understand that I have accepted he doesn’t want a romantic relationship with me, but I am good friends with a few exes and histiocytoma dog removal cost I thought we’d reached that turning point where it might start to histiocytoma dog removal cost be ok. I know I should accept that he didn’t want to talk but I couldn’t understand how that had changed after a really nice histiocytoma dog removal cost couple of hours together. I miss him.

Anyway. I tried to call once but he didn’t answer, so I went round to his house again. I do understand I shouldn’t do that but I wanted a resolution and it histiocytoma dog removal cost was the only way I could get him to talk histiocytoma dog removal cost to me. We talked for an hourish, he told me he was moving in with his new histiocytoma dog removal cost gf (who he’s known less than 3 months, but ok), I told him that I just want to talk about histiocytoma dog removal cost my relationship with him and how we can hang out histiocytoma dog removal cost occasionally, not his relationship with her, and he said he wanted to but also needed to histiocytoma dog removal cost take her feelings into account. I didn’t disagree but reminded him that he promised only a histiocytoma dog removal cost few weeks ago that no woman would dictate to him histiocytoma dog removal cost who he could be friends with. I said if she wanted to meet me I would histiocytoma dog removal cost do that.

So we hugged, a lot, and he promised me he would call me next wednesday. I went home, 20 minutes later my phone rang, and he told me he’d spoken to his gf who was livid. He told me they’re not just moving in together they’re getting married and they’d been shopping for wedding rings that morning. She threatened to call the whole thing off if he histiocytoma dog removal cost didn’t cut me off right away. He told me we will never be friends ever again, I’m not going to **** this up because of you, hung up, then proceeded to block me from every form of communication.

I was just totally numb. I still am a bit. I know this is it and I need to move histiocytoma dog removal cost on. I know I have behaved badly in trying to force histiocytoma dog removal cost contact, but he had been so adamant about us being friends histiocytoma dog removal cost and I was really upset that he changed on that histiocytoma dog removal cost but didn’t have the balls to tell me. I know I didn’t respect his (implied) boundary. I honestly still don’t believe he REALLY wanted to get rid of me, I see this completely as her doing. He had accepted my facebook friend request before the first histiocytoma dog removal cost time I popped to his house. We had good banter the day I saw him.

But then, I phoned someone I know who I thought might know histiocytoma dog removal cost the new gf. I just asked her if she could tell me what histiocytoma dog removal cost she’s like. I just couldn’t believe that this incredibly smart, successful, sensitive man who told me I’d broken his heart a few months earlier was rushing histiocytoma dog removal cost into marriage with someone he’d known 11 weeks. And putting up with ultimatums like that. The person I know said the new gf is incredibly histiocytoma dog removal cost charming, very beautiful and the most evil manipulative narcissist she’s ever met. She said she had seen her destroy people (not in a romantic context, she didn’t know much about her in that way) without compunction. And from what I read rushing into marriage fits the histiocytoma dog removal cost narcissist bill perfectly.

My ex is so trusting, by his own admission, and has been ripped off in the past to the histiocytoma dog removal cost tune of $25000. He’s a good man and I honestly couldn’t give a fk if she breaks his heart, but marriage involves financial ties and he’s so close to paying off his mortgage and he’s just landed a fantastic career defining job, but he will need to perform well for it to histiocytoma dog removal cost continue. I know if i tried to say anything at all histiocytoma dog removal cost he would a) not listen b)get angry with me and c) if it encouraged him in any way to slow down histiocytoma dog removal cost and think things through and then this relationship fell apart histiocytoma dog removal cost he would blame me. So I know I can’t do anything,but I’m really worried for him now. I know exactly what you’re all going to say haha. That I just need to back the fk off and histiocytoma dog removal cost move on. It’s not my business. But I can’t bear the thought that in a few years his histiocytoma dog removal cost life might be ruined by this. Even if he has been an a** to me. I would rather he hated me forever. I think. I realise that there’s every chance they might live happily ever after, but the person I spoke to is an acquaintance of histiocytoma dog removal cost mine who had no need to lie about anything..

I have to agree with some of the other posters. I don’t think you’re really ok just being friends with this guy. At least the way he’s thinking of it. I have a lot of male friends that I chat histiocytoma dog removal cost with from time to time but I can go months histiocytoma dog removal cost and months without talking to them because they’re doing other things (or I am) – this doesn’t bother me because I don’t have any romantic investment in them and they have histiocytoma dog removal cost none in me. Your reaction to his behavior makes it very clear that histiocytoma dog removal cost you aren’t ok with just being friends. At least admit that to yourself.

As for his marriage, I understand the need to figure out why. We all do this: the over-analyzing stage. We turn it over and over in our minds, trying to make sense of it all. The reality is that he has chosen to be with histiocytoma dog removal cost her and to stay with her, narcissist or not. He is a grown man and will have to deal histiocytoma dog removal cost with the choices that he makes. If you try to interfere, you will only push him further and further away. I sense some co-dependency in your behavior towards this man and this is histiocytoma dog removal cost not healthy for you.

Bottom line: you have to let this guy go. Leave him alone – do not try to connect with him in any way histiocytoma dog removal cost from here. Stop trying to insert yourself in his life. Be honest with yourself about what you’re doing. Let him live his life and make his choices. If you guys are meant to become friends one day histiocytoma dog removal cost it will happen a very long time from now, after both of you have moved on. I know it’s hard to not analyze his relationship or what is histiocytoma dog removal cost really going on, but you will never have answers for this and will histiocytoma dog removal cost only make yourself crazy. So try to focus on things in your own life.

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